It Could Still Be Simple

Your little hands wrapped around my finger
And, it's so quiet in the world tonight
You're little eyelids flutter cause you're dreaming
So, I tuck you in
Turn on your favorite night light
To you, everything's funny
You got nothing to regret
I'd give all I had, honey
If you could stay like that

Oh, darling don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up
Just stay this little
Oh, darling don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up
It can stay this simple

I won't let nobody hurt you, won't let no one break your heart
And no one will desert you
Just try to never grow up, and never grow up
"Never Grow Up"
Taylor Swift

This sweetly sad song makes me cry every time I hear it. You know how people say, "You don't know what you have until it's gone?" I think that's how innocence is. I don't know the moment when I realized my parents couldn't fix all my problems for me, but I know that by then, my view of the world as an inherently good place was shattered.
I know that everyone has to grow up eventually. I know that there are benefits to becoming an adult, but right now, tucked into my bed and all alone with my fears and memories, I wish I could choose to stay a child.
I feel fragile, so easily broken and so difficult to mend.

These sleepless nights are becoming an unwelcome habit.

Finals are this week. I will be very ready for them to be over. I think I will pass all my classes, but aside from that, I'm a little weary. Year round school is my preference but it makes downtime that much more coveted. I want to spend an entire day in my pajamas doing nothing but drawing, reading and writing.
Maybe even a nap! :-D

'Quel