An Addie Update

Today made me feel as if I am very old and weary.
It also made me feel as if yesterday's dark clouds were hovering over today. I am to the point where I am desperately begging God on my knees to make tomorrow a better day, because I just can't take anymore. It's one thing after another after another.

There are some praises I must make.

Addie came out of surgery just fine. The vet was puzzled as to why her litter only consisted of two very large babies (both stillborn, both female), when 99.98% of rat litters are between 6 and 24 babies. I am hurt and also a little bitter. I will indulge myself for only a moment and then it's gone.

Why is it that people who don't care about their animals, or have them get pregnant accidentally, have huge litters of healthy babies? Why did my coddled and well taken care of rat have to lose her babies? I know 'fair' isn't in the cards on earth, but it does make me have a slightly bad taste in my mouth, especially when I think about how nurturing Addie was with her dead baby.

*sigh*

And I don't mean to overshadow my gratefulness. I am so very, very thankful that Adelaide came out of surgery well. The vet expects a complete recovery. I have her on some pain meds and she is sleeping nicely in the isolation cage I set up for her. I would have given much more than I did to have her delivered safely back to me.

I think I am just very, very tired. I am running on little sleep and high emotions.

In this post, however, I would like to add that I am very thankful for my friend Jake. He wouldn't leave me alone to be depressed today and for that I am grateful. I needed to be with someone and he was a shoulder to cry on.

I'm off to bed. Sleep well.

'Quel